scissors cutting marriage certificate

Are You Struggling with the Pain of Separation and Divorce?

Do you find yourself consumed with sadness, anxiety, and stress regarding the future as you struggle through the process of separation and divorce?   Are you worried about the effects of divorce on your children?  Maybe you are the child of divorce, and you don't ever want to inflict that pain on your own children, so you are miserable in your marriage but don't see a way out. 

Perhaps you were blindsided by your spouse who wanted a  divorce, and you are emotionally devastated and barely able to function.  You are stunned to find yourself in this situation, because you took your vows seriously and never considered separation or divorce an option. Or, if you initiated the divorce, you may be filled with guilt or regret and wonder if you made the right decision.

Regardless of the circumstances, divorce is often one of the most painful and difficult events a person may experience.  Separation and divorce may elicit feelings of grief and loss, anxiety, anger, resentment, shame and the feeling that life has been turned upside down.  You may also experience disturbances in sleep, appetite and mood that affect the quality of your daily life.  You feel helpless as you watch your children struggle too.  Your entire life has been turned upside down.  The legal, emotional and logistical decisions you need to make can feel overwhelming, especially if you are unable to think clearly due to sleep or mood disturbances.

Divorce Counseling, Pre-Divorce Counseling and Post- Divorce Therapy Is Effective

Divorce counseling helps you move past your pain and guide you through the process of separation and divorce.  As a licensed therapist and divorce counselor, I help you develop a step by step action plan to navigate the countless decisions you need to make regarding your current situation, as well as helping you rebuild your life after divorce.  If you have children and there are custody issues, the process is even more stressful and challenging, but something we will tackle together.  Divorce therapy can help you work through the pain of the past, regain control over your emotions, and move forward toward a healthy and more positive future.

woman looking sad sitting in a chair

If You Are Struggling with Separation And Divorce, You Are Not Alone!

Approximately 40% to 50% of married couples in the United States get divorced.  Despite knowing the sobering statistics of divorce and how common it is, you may still feel alone.  Divorce is a difficult and stressful life event, and it affects not only the couple and the children, but also extended family members and friends.  Sometimes the conflicts and differing opinions result in family and friends choosing sides, which may make it difficult for you to get the support you need at such a critical time.   The ending of a relationship is often traumatic, and can be both physically and emotionally challenging.

Therapy for Divorce or Separation for Individuals, Couples or Families

Divorce therapy provides you with valuable help, guidance and support through this difficult and challenging life event.   The process of achieving a healthy divorce recovery allows you to rebuild your life and move forward in a healthy and positive manner.  You will learn new coping skills, how to improve communication and decrease conflict, manage your stress, decrease your anger, and move past your resentments, guilt and shame.  Your divorce recovery toolbox may also focus on decisions regarding dating again, and how and when to introduce the new relationship to your children.

man sitting on a bench with his head down.

Why Not Just Join a Support Group?

You can absolutely join a divorce support group, and I often recommend them.  Sometimes I even offer Divorce Recovery Groups and workshops.  Many divorce support groups are not run by licensed professionals, and therefore may not provide the guidance and experience you need.  It really depends on the extent of your suffering, and whether you are riding the emotional roller coaster often associated with separation and divorce.  If you are emotionally devastated, suffering from depression, panic attacks and intense anxiety, it may be best for you to work individually with a divorce therapist or seek divorce counseling.  This allows you to seek individual counseling in a safe and supportive environment with an experienced, licensed professional.

What Makes Your Divorce Counseling Approach Unique?

I have been in private practice in CA for over 30 years, and I specialize in working with people who are going through separation or divorce.  In addition to practicing as a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I also have a Masters’ Degree in Education and taught middle school prior to becoming a therapist.  I am passionate about helping people move past their pain and finding real life solutions to their everyday problems.  We create a tool box together to help you take action to get the results you want.  All sessions are offered virtually by phone, , FT or zoom sessions if you are a resident of CA.  I am licensed to practice in CA.

pelicans on a boardwalk

What If I’m Already Divorced?

I frequently work with people who are already divorced, but still having a difficult time transitioning to their new life.  My philosophy emphasizes post-divorce growth, not just divorce recovery.  I help you move from the pain of the past to a more hopeful and optimistic future.  Perhaps the issue of re-entering the dating world is scary, or maybe your new relationship is beginning to cause anxiety and stress.  I also help you navigate the challenges of a new relationship as it relates to children, including how to introduce them, help them feel safe, and incorporate healthy boundaries.  As a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, I also help blended families adjust to their new circumstances, deal with stepchildren issues, parenting concerns, territorial problems, and heal the baggage they bring to their blended family.

How Long Will Divorce Therapy Take?

Divorce recovery and post-divorce growth is a process,  The emphasis is on problem solving and learning new strategies and coping skills to help you move forward.  The length of time is usually determined by the severity of the problem and your ability to participate in the process.  If you are motivated and ready to move forward, you may find that the investment in your mental health and well -being will result in positive benefits in a relatively short period of time. 

How to Contact Me for Divorce Therapy or Divorce Counseling

Please email me for a free 15 minute phone consultation.

Email: shellee@thesolutiontherapist.com

Phone: (949) 261-8299     

Shellee Moore, LMFT


Maxim for life: you get treated in life the way you teach people how to treat you.
— Wayne Dyer

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